I have heard it time and again, but it never stops resonating within my soul.
Why, indeed. Why am I blessed beyond measure, with countless joys coming from this little girl? Why me, when my own heart, my life, is wretched, cursed with sin? Why so much beauty, why so much joy, when my life should be nothing but sorrow, hurting, grieving over the loss and the pain?
Why did God choose to heal my hurts, be a balm for my wounds, and cure the ache within me?
Surely, it’s nothing short of love. It’s nothing short of miraculous.
Why would He choose to love me?
But He does. And His gifts, His love, His miraculous care for me never ceases to astonish and amaze.
I cannot escape it, nor would I want to. At times, I wish that I could go back to the girl who walked that long, dark road, but I know that I would not have listened. I would not have heard. Because God was working, slowly, surely, inside of me. I know that those dark days molded and shaped me into something I never could have imagined. Into something breathtakingly beautiful. Beauty from ashes. Life from death.
So many days, I just accept it all as is. I forget the blessings, accepting it all as normal, part of my days.
When, really, my life is nothing short of miraculous. The fact that I woke up this morning, the very breath in my lungs, my amazing husband who is so very good to me, and my beautiful, smart, active daughter who teaches me so much every day. Why was I given even one? Why am I blessed with all?
It’s a question that I can never be fully satisfied with.
And my only solution?
To thank. To be thankful, grateful, every day that I am given. In the storms, in the rain, in the sun, in the hurricane, and in the breeze.
Thanking for the good and the hard, the easy and the difficult. For reminders that I do not deserve one, much less two. For the two and the three and the multitude of blessings. For the ever-flowing waterfall of love and mercy. For the never-ceasing molding and shaping and conforming to His image.
For the tools of sanctification and the outrageous downpours of grace.
|Abby and her cousin, Aaron, on Mimi|
|Sweet moments with my Little Girlie|
|My sweet girl and I|
|Such a beautiful daughter, and I’m so very humbled by it all!|
Praise God, from whom all blessings flow!!